Im only happy when im high?

hey,im 16, ive always been shy, or people have said awww he is just shy, but i think its worse than that,im always nervous around people i dont know and feel sick sometimes and cant get my words out, being in social situations is horrible,like when im catching the bus ill just feel like an idiot, i dress normally,look normal,but i just feel like im an idiot and people dont like me, i became depressed and tried to kill myself about a year ago,recently i have just been gettin high on weed,and everything seems so much nicer, its so hard to explain 4 those of you who dont get high,but when i was high the other day at the bus stop on the way to college, i didnt care about what people thought of me, just staring into a puddle smiling, just thinking about how beautiful the cars were and random stuff like that lol :$, should i keep on getting high and live a happy comfortable life i hope i deserve, or just try to deal with the uncomfort of being around people when not stoned ? :S